It's windy [something about too many beans in the casolet if that's your sense of humour - I'm not going to make that joke - way too classy]. Weather in France is like English weather but ruder and more arrogant. Sometimes with good reason. A large branch has fallen down. I'm not really sure what to do with it. There's a chance I'll throw it into the neighbour's garden. A problem shared etc.
This morning the croissants from our local bakery weren't up to their usual standard. I'd imagine a frenchman would probably take his half eaten croissant back to the bakery and rub it into the baker's face, but seeing as they were still 10 times better than anything you get in England I rubbed them into my face.